Are you trapped in this pattern?

April 24, 2019

 

Are you a goal-setter? To-do list-maker? Accomplishment junkie? If so, you may be caught in a trap. I call it the "wait-until trap". I see it all the time! 
 
I hear things like:
 
“I’ll be happy when I get my house in order.”
“I’ll be happy when I have more money.”
“I’ll be happy when I lose the weight.”
“I’ll be happy when my kids get out of school.”
“I’ll be happy when my kids go back to school.”
 
The list goes on and on. 
 
The problem with the wait-until trap is that we’re never happy! We never get there. When we actually do reach a goal or get that thing we thought would make us happy, we’re still not happy – we just find something else to wait for.
 
Here’s another side of the wait-until trap.
 
You tell yourself you can’t do things until you accomplish a goal.
 
Women especially are so guilty of this! I hear things like:
 
"I can’t buy new clothes until I lose weight."
"I can’t relax until I get everything on my to-do list done."
"I can’t enjoy a treat unless I work out."
"I can't do something fun unless I do something to deserve it."
"I can’t feel good about myself unless I look a certain way."
 
Does these sound familiar? Is it possible that YOU have fallen into this trap? What have you been waiting for? What have you put on hold? 
 
The worst problem with this pattern is that it keeps you from ENJOYING your life now! 
 
How do you get past this trap? You shift your attention from the external goal to your internal feelings. You see, most of us want the things we want in life because we believe those things will make us feel the way we want to feel. So, what is it that you want to FEEL by accomplishing your goal? 
 
You can choose to feel that way NOW. Now is actually the only time you get to choose. We can’t rewind our lives and choose our feelings in the past. Nor can we fast-forward and choose our feelings in the future.
 
The only point of power in our lives is NOW. So choose now!
 
How do you choose your feelings? Here's an example. Let’s say you set a goal because you think you’ll feel PROUD of yourself after accomplishing the goal.
 
You can simply choose to feel proud now. Feel proud every step of the way.
 
When you get up on time in the morning, feel proud.
When you make your bed, feel proud.
When you go to work, feel proud.
When you eat well or exercise, feel proud.
When you take any step to accomplish your goal, feel proud at every step.
 
You don’t have to wait until you reach the goal to feel the way you want to feel! You don’t have to wait until you accomplish something to feel good about yourself! You don’t have to do a damn thing to be worthy.
 
STOP WAITING!
 
This doesn’t mean you can’t still set goals and accomplish things in your life. In fact, you may actually find that you accomplish more, faster. Just try something new: don’t put your life on hold while you do it. 
 
Let me know how this serves you.

Love and light,
     

Mendy

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